Location: Texas (but im a new mexico resident)
i posted this on another subreddit and was told i should also post it here.
I, 19F was at a bar a few weeks ago. (i never go to bars and i just happened to end up at one to meet a guy i had been talking to.) I was drinking, and he M23 (the “manager/barback”) was serving & voiding my drinks. This man has been extremely sexual which i did play into via text, considering he was acting like he wants something “serious” with me and i finally let my guard down stupidly. anyways, eventually i am there alone while hes working and i begin to get touchy, i dont remember what we were talking about as i can barely remember anything. next thing i know, he tells me to go to the restroom and i DRUNKENLY follow him. I dont know how long we were in there, all i remember is entering, hearing someone knock and then exiting. today i found out (because he was drunk and ignorant) that he RECORDED me giving him head inside the restroom. and i know some of you will shame me for this as yes i was stupid, but again i was beyond my limit and was clearly way to drunk that i didnt even notice or suspect that he recorded me. After trying to convince him for nearly a hour to delete it while he laughed at me he “did” but i dont think he did..? he got caught today by the owner, who confronted him about “having sex in the restroom” to which he replied immaturely to which worries me because i dont want this to become public let alone the surveillance footage which is how the boss found out. i am extremely anxious that not only he will expose me with the actual video, but that the bar will post it on a local instagram news outlet. i know im probably just paranoid. but when he showed me “proof” of deleting the video i saw multiple other womans videos in his hidden folder as well. i asked hypothetically if we were steady for a year if hed delete them for me and he said no, and became rude to me saying he wouldnt do something like delete anything just because i asked him to which leads me to worrying about if he really ever deleted mine. i mean he sr him deleting it from hidden and then recently deleted but he couldve sent it to himself or others or have a copy in his camera roll or even just keep the 3 second vid+ picture he took that showed during the sr of him “deleting “ it. i dont know what to do, should i let it pass? i blocked him and told him if he didnt delete jt i would file a police report and he said he had nothing to worry about because he deleted it. but he drunkenly admitted to wanting to keep it to “watch later” and even humiliated me for what i did in the restroom that night. any advice please??? or any woman OR men that have been in a similar situation can you please lmk what happened? should i file a report already? id prefer if nobody found out especially not my parents.