Location: Texas
My wife was having an affair with an older married man for at least 3 years. I found out a few months ago when it ended and have been going through it. My wife and I are trying to work it out, going to marriage counseling, individual therapy, etc. She is plagued with remorse and guilt right now. I am a bit numb and still processing. Meanwhile, I've been trying to decide whether to tell this man's wife.
I believe she is truly clueless. On her social media, she seems like a happily married, devoted wife and mother. They've been married for decades. I'm sure this news would destroy her. I don't want an innocent woman to be hurt, but at the same time, I feel she deserves to know what has been going on. Is it worth it at this point since they are both older, in their 50s?
I'm leaning toward yes, but the question is how to break this news to her? I want to keep it anonymous and do it by email. My wife shared everything with me, and it’s just crazy. Years of texts, calls, pictures. They were basically in a full-blown relationship and double life. Some of them are quite graphic and intimate.
If I decide to tell the wife, what should I send her, and how much?
This man is pretty well off and has powerful connections, and I could see him trying to come at me legally if possible. So I would want to make sure I am within legal boundaries. I know not to send any nude photos. And not share with anyone but his wife. Is there anything else I should consider? Should I just let it go and continue to focus on repairing my own crumbling marriage and not destroy anyone else's?
He told my wife, this is not his first affair in his marriage. His wife may already know what is going on. I don't know.
My question is: If I decide to inform the wife about this affair, what can I legally share with her without her husband trying to sue me for something?
My main concerns are: public disclosure of private facts, intentional infliction of emotional distress, invasion of privacy or something along those lines. This man has a gigantic ego, money to blow and friends/family that are attorneys.